Remember!!

Wow, it’s been almost 3 months since my last posting, August 31. 

Next week, Wednesday, November 30, makes 18 months since Lori graduated to Home with God.  Then on December 26, my mom, Becky, celebrates her 14^th year with God. 

Lori and my mom were oh so similar..people loved them both..I mean choke people.  At both of their services, over 1000 people attended it..they were much loved.  They also put up with a lack of a better description – difficult husbands..lol..speaking of me and my dad…and at times, very spoiled kids (my brother, me and of course Brandi).  But they never complained, they never passed on their responsibilities, they never left anything unturned or took for granted what they had.  They also passed at a very young age, Lori @ 46 years old, 2 days shy of her 47^th birthday and my mom at 56 years young. 

Thanksgiving holidays were special for my mom..and for us as a family. In the 25 years Lori and I were married and for the most part of Brandi’s 13 years before my mom passed in 2002, we spent Thanksgiving week in Hilo.  A couple times in Kauai (saved those trips for either New Years or Christmas or other monthly trips taken by Lori and Brandi)..but for the most part, we spent Thanksgiving on the Big Island.  My mom, would go all out.  She cooked for an army and typically an army showed up. From Thursday lunch till we left on Sunday, family and friends all came to the Nakamoto’s on Kalo Street.  All of the Arquero bunch and the Nakamoto bunch came to my mom’s house.  It was an annual gathering..nobody missed it and all of our family can attest to that.  It was ohana…it was where people met, reconnected, lived out and remembered memories of family lore.  I mean, it was never a boring gathering.  It was the party central of our ohana.  My mom, was like my Grandpa Arquero, she could cook for the masses and she cooked well.  Family members brought some pupus and deserts (especially Aunty Joni deserts), but the main course – the turkey, bone in ham, shoyu chicken with gizzards, stuffing, potatoes, mac-potato salad, and of course her turkey jook was always available and I mean enough to feed at least 60-75 throughout the entire weekend.

So many memories and so many treasured time with my mom.  When she passed, the party ended and to this day, I miss seeing all the family and ohana. 

The biggest memory I have is my mom and Brandi.  You see my mom, when we first told her that Lori and I were having a baby back in 1989, was not happy with the situation.  She had me in a similar fashion, super young, barely 21 (like Lori and I), and as always, parents want better for their kids..not that having a kid at a young age wasn’t better..it was just not what she had hoped for.  I remember when we told her in early Summer 1989 that Lori was pregnant, she did not say one word..she wiped her hands on her cooking apron and went back to cook..I think she actually cried while cooking her Korean chicken…Lori and I went to the room and Lori was like, your mom, “doesn’t like me”..and cried as well.  My mom did not tell anyone she was having a grandbaby till after Brandi was born, but she was there days after Brandi was born to see her.  I know she was not ashamed, she just did not want Lori and I to repeat the patterns of her and my dad..the struggles of a young couple with a child.  It was a different time when they did it in the late 60’s and the same for Lori and I in the early 90’s. 

Yet, my mom was Brandi’s biggest cheerleader, encourager and Grandma of the Century.  Man, those were sure great days…to this day, I miss those Thanksgiving weekends…seeing my Grandpa Nakamoto passed out and snoring on the sofa…me and uncle Poncho or uncle Junior in a snoring contest…and then on Sunday, seeing my mom put up her Christmas tree.  Those memories resonate for me…even more so now than ever before. 

I am so thankful for the 34 years I had with my mom and the 26 years I had with Lori…not long enough but worth every moment.  Life was not easy growing up in Hilo, I had numerous struggles, but the constant was my mom.  Lori and I in our first 13 years struggled within our marriage – but the 1 constant was Lori’s grace and patience with me…2 amazing women in my lives..and now I am blessed to see a young vibrant 27 year old daughter flourish even in the midst of her own struggles and battles.  My mom and Lori laid a great foundation for Brandi…she has much experiences and memories to live off of and has a great future ahead of her..one that was based on a legacy left by mom and by Lori.  I pray every day for Brandi, to know that she is loved by God, by her Grandma Becky and by Lori and by me and all those who have been around us.  I pray that God continues to fill her with hope and a future that will bring glory to Him.  I have been blessed and will continue to be grateful for everyday that I get to live out remembering my mom and my wife. 

Lord, thank You for blessing me with 3 wonderful women in my life and many more.  I pray Lord that Your will and way be in my life and in Brandi’s life.  Lord, may you be glorified in everything that we do in midst of great loss but a future with great hope and assured promises by You.  To You be the glory!!!